October 28, 2014

Eyebrows, and the Child On the Bus


The battery on my tablet was dead, so I used Krita (might as well have been Paint, for all the skill I used) on my laptop...
I am writing this during my fall reading week, although by the time this is read, it'll probably be November or something.

After several minutes of contemplating my eyebrows, I have concluded that they're kind of... well, strange. Eyebrows in general, not just mine. They're just bizarre-looking things up close. And I don't know about anyone else's, but mine are really soft. I'd continue stroking them forever if I didn't have an irrational fear that they'd fall off.

Shortly after writing the above, I went downstairs to my parents - who'd just come in - and fully inspected their eyebrows. I commend them for taking it all in stride. They didn't even ask me why I was so interested in their eyebrows, even though my mum asks me to explain every other minute facet of my life. She was probably too tired to care. I just waltzed into the kitchen where they were congregated, and, immediately after greeting them, told my mum that I was going to look very closely at and stroke her eyebrows. She closed her eyes and let me stroke them, then I moved on to inspecting my dad's, and it hasn't occurred to me how strange that was until right now.

I'm so weird that my parents don't even ask questions anymore.

My mother has fabulous eyebrows.

I wish mine were more like hers.

Anyway, here's a truncated transcript of my interaction with a little boy on the bus a little while ago.

Child: I'm six!

He shows me six fingers.

Me: That's a good age. I wish I was six. Guess how old I am.

Child: Thirteen!

Me: ... No.

I say goodbye as he exits the bus with his mother, and wonder if I actually look thirteen.

October 25, 2014

The Leaf


Another (disappointing) story in the series of anthropomorphic objects! Part one, part two, part three.

This one took me much too long to write.

The Leaf

   "Tell me a story," the voice said. It was a dry, crinkly sort of voice, one that sent a pins-and-needles shiver down my spine and made the back of my neck prickle. I didn't know where it was coming from. I was, as far as I knew, alone in a cave, trapped by the blizzard raging around me.

   "Yeah," I said, "I'll tell you a story. What do you want to hear about?"

   "Anything," said the voice. "I have not had much contact with the outside world lately."

October 22, 2014



No image today, don't have my tablet with me.

The University of Ottawa is under lockdown. It's pretty boring here, just sitting and waiting, but there's something important that's just happened -

The soldier who was shot while standing guard at the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier died.

A few things first:

1. This MIGHT NOT be an act of terrorism, people. Please wait for further news before speculating and martyring the gunman before we even know why he acted like this.

2. Students in my class, and I'm assuming other classes around campus, are leaving the building. This is both unsafe and impedes police work. The entire downtown area is shut down, the buses aren't running, all the garages are locked; their only option is walking. What the hell is wrong with them?

3. Students are celebrating that their midterms and classes are cancelled. It seems insensitive to me, but understandable. Our immediate lives take precedence over a stranger's life.

I don't have the capacity to write words of condolence to offer the soldier's family. They'll have many words from many other people, better written ones, and all I can say is that I'm sorry.

My thoughts are with them.

Edit: Lockdown was lifted a little after 16:00. Bus service was horribly slow going towards Parliament, as was expected. Best wishes to everyone, and thank you to all law enforcement personnel involved.

Edit 2: "The Soldier" is Corporal Nathan Cirillo, whose name was released a few hours ago.

October 21, 2014

Kinesin Part 3: Don't Let Go


October 18, 2014

Kinesin Part 2: Kinesin Meets Myosin

Click to enlarge.

October 14, 2014

Kinesin Part 1

Click to enlarge.

October 11, 2014

A Love Letter


No, I swear Second Cup®/MD isn't sponsoring me. If they were, I'd have free coffee. I do not have free coffee.
As much as I like a good night's sleep, coffee is an acceptable substitute. Well, almost acceptable. The part where it's a diuretic, and occasionally a laxative, is not so great.

Oh right, this is supposed to be a love letter. In the words of Vita Sackville-West to Virginia Woolf:

"I am reduced to a thing that wants [coffee]. I composed a beautiful letter to you in the sleepless nightmare hours of the night, and it has all gone: I just miss you, in a quite simple desperate human way [...] However I won't bore you with any more."

October 07, 2014

The Attack


Were they attacked by drummers? Squirrels? Republicans? PLEASE TELL ME BECAUSE I REALLY WANT TO KNOW.
The other day, I received a spam message from one of those petition sites - you know, Change.org or something - and the subject line read:

"Dear [Tory], Please help! My sister and her husband were attacked by..."

... By what? Ebola? A bear? Jehovah's Witnesses? How could I possibly change any of those things by signing an online petition?

In related news, [South] Korea apparently has a lot of intense Christianity-spreaders (CS). My friend Gail told me about her friend - I'll call her Flo - who had an "encounter". The CSs buzzed Flo's apartment, claiming they had a delivery. When she opened the door, they didn't have any packages, but they did have the Lord.

I always thought the Lord was supposed to deliver us.

October 04, 2014

Turkeyball Noodle Soup

    When Life throws you a kitchen fire, stare at it blankly with a spatula in hand.
    Do you like soup? I like soup. This is a soup recipe that is both extensive and curiously useless.

    If you are vegetarian, you can omit the ground meat or replace it, and use vegetable broth instead of chicken broth.


    Any vegetables you want in the soup. I suggest primarily celery (3-5 stalks), onions (1 large, preferably yellow), and carrots (equal amount to celery), plus anything else. If you're sick, add lots of garlic. If you want potatoes, use a couple yellow ones. If you want mushrooms, use any kind. You can also use spinach, kale, zucchini, etc., although I don't think lettuce is a particularly good idea.